Pundom
by RicardianScholar Clark-Weasley
Summary: Adrien's and Marinette's reunion after London Fashion Week is spoiled when Marinette discovers a pun on something inappropriate.


When Marinette got home she was greeted by the wondrous sight of her boyfriend lazily flipping through her sketchbook as he looked absolutely gorgeous in her computer chair.

It was a sight for sore eyes seeing as Adrien had spent the previous week and a half in London for the London Fashion Week and Marinette didn't even think twice about dropping her shopping and throwing herself at him.

(She was only vaguely aware of Tiki dragging Plagg out of the room as she did so. Th black cat Kwami certainly sounded as if he was complaining the entire way up to the roof.)

" _Adrien_!" she cried out ecstatically.

Adrien spun round in her computer chair and caught her with great ease. "Greetings Princess," he chuckled as his eyes lit up with delight. Her stomach fluttered at the sight of his infamous Cheshire cat grin. She missed it with and without the mask. "Did you miss me?"

Words could not describe how much she missed him and if it did she would never be able to utter them without dissolving into a stammering mess and feeding into his insufferably huge ego. So instead she decided to answer him by showing how much she missed him.

She grappled at his shirt desperately as she steadied herself onto his lap and then slowly, teasingly so, she glided her hands up his arms and shoulders before she cupped his beautiful face and hauled him in for a kiss.

It started of fierce and forceful as she poured in all of her frustration and loneliness from the last week and a half into this kiss. She had missed him so much it was ridiculous. He was in almost every aspect of her life now and having to fight crime, go to school, spend time with their friends all without him had made her crave him like mad.

She even missed the stupid puns.

(But don't tell him that or he'll never stop punning for the rest of their days.)

The kiss changed though as Adrien's arms pulled her closer, his hands splayed themselves on her hips as he helped her sit more comfortably on his lap, and his lips took charged as he softened their kiss and savoured every brush of their lips against one another. His tongue requested entry with a gentle touch and Marinette happily granted it as her fingers tangled themselves into his soft, silky, locks.

She moaned blissfully as the kiss deepened and would have gladly spent the rest of her afternoon in this one kiss alone but unfortunately the need to breathe soon kicked in and they regretfully had to pull apart.

She panted slightly against his shoulder as she desperately tried to catch her breath.

Adrien let out a gorgeous, breathy, laugh as he moved his arms up to cup her back and cradle her to his chest. "I'll take that as a yes," he said smugly as he nuzzled her hair.

She could feel him smile against her forehead.

"Take it however you like, Kitty," Marinette said in her best sultry voice as she pulled away enough so she could tower over him, "just as long as you kiss me again"

"Gladly," Adrien murmured huskily.

And with that he cupped her face as she had his earlier and pulled her down for another kiss. They both groaned in utter delight as their kiss quickly heated up.

Marinette squealed in excitement when Adrien suddenly stood up. Her legs automatically wrapped themselves round his waist as she grabbed hold of his shirt to stop herself from falling backwards and landing on her head like the complete klutz she is.

They staggered across her bedroom, crashing into things as Marinette certainly made it difficult for Adrien to see where he was going as she kissed him over and over again with deep, lingering, kisses. She had been unable to resist nipping and suckling his bottom lip which had just been begging to be kissed in all of the photos she had seen online in their week apart.

Eventually they managed to make it to her bed without any major injury and Adrien flopped back onto her mattress and allowed Marinette to take full control as she straddled his hips.

"Do you," she spoke up as she kissed him quickly, lightly, on the lips, "have," another quick, fleeting kiss, "some," she kissed him again and again unable to resist him whatsoever, "protection?"

They had used the last of the condoms she kept stashed in her bedside table just before he left for London and Marinette hadn't had the chance to stock up what with all the criminals in Paris refusing to take a holiday when Chat Noir is away, and Alya in constant need of reassurance that Chat Noir has not left Ladybug for good, and Chloe being…well _Chloe_ , and school piling on the homework, and her parents needing her to help out.

He nodded. "My pocket," he croaked out.

Marinette fumbled through Adrien's jean pocket highly conscious of the effect that seemed to be having on Adrien as his face flushed bright pink and his breathing became even more erratic. After what felt like forever, her fingers brushed against a plastic wrapper and she triumphantly pulled out the condom.

Her grin melted instantly into a frown of confusion as she took in the wrapper. For some reason there was a picture of a baguette on the white wrapper with black bold letters printed over and beneath it. The words were English but they were simple enough for her to grasp what they were saying.

 **Do you want to see my baguette?**

Marinette felt her eye twitch slightly at the God awful, crude, pun as the mood was now effectively ruined. Why did she say she missed Adrien's puns again? And who earth puts _puns_ on a _condom_?! What is the point in that?!

"…Adrien," Marinette said softly as a rising suspicion filled her voice, "did you purposely go out of your way to buy PUN condoms?!"

"Erm, kinda?" Adrien offered sheepishly. "I managed to escape for an afternoon and went to this tourist-y shop and there was a whole rack of this puns on condoms. I suppose," he said cheerfully as his face lit up with mirth, "You could say they're _pun_ doms!"

"No," Marinette said flatly, "just no."

"C'mon Marinette! Sweet Princess," Adrien wheedled. "It's _funny!_ You know it is."

"It's really not," Marinette disagreed. "How many of these stupid things did you get?"

His grin immediately turned sheepish as Adrien rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously. "Erm…" he trailed off with a shrug.

Marinette sighed.

She decided she didn't want to know how many or how stupid the puns were. These condoms were obviously an immature _boy_ thing, since Marinette didn't get why anyone would want a joke on one otherwise, and Adrien so rarely got to act like an immature boy with his father constantly watching his every move like a hawk. How could Marinette begrudge Adrien his moment of sheer silliness and freedom? Especially when they made him so happy with that gorgeous, goofy, grin of his.

So instead of being put off by finding a pun on the condom, Marinette leaned down and left a lingering kiss on Adrien's lips before she pressed another in the corner of his lips and then slowly trailed kisses against his jaw.

"You're lucky that you're cute," she murmured, "And that I have really missed you."

She would have continued pressing kisses down his neck but Adrien suddenly grabbed hold of her and pulled her back to his lips. As they attempted to devour one another in their latest, most ravishing, kiss, she could feel his lips curl into a self-satisfied, infuriatingly smug, smirk against her own.

But she wasn't going to let that ruin the mood either.

After all she now had a new found mission in life to get rid of every damn pun condom that Adrien had dared to bring back from London.

And she was going to enjoy every second of it too.


End file.
